The Grief of Social Work
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For the month of March, we are recognizing Social Work Appreciation and Women’s History Month. I want to spend some time discussing the unspoken- the grief of social work. The social work professional calling is really the labor of holding. How much can you hold? Handle? Execute? Do it efficiently and come back tomorrow and do it again. We become skilled in holding space, holding pain, holding the weight of broken systems while trying to help our clients survive them. But in the midst of that, something happens: we lose the capacity and availability to hold space for ourselves.
While this is a month dedicated to both Social Work Month and Women’s History Month, it is a time to celebrate the labor of social workers—particularly the women who make up the vast majority of this field. But celebration alone is not enough. Because beneath the service, the advocacy, and the impact is something that rarely gets named: grief.
The Emotional Labor That No One Sees
Social work demands more than knowledge, degrees, fancy trainings or credentials. It requires empathy, the ability to hold space for suffering, and the skill to navigate institutions that often do more harm than good. For women in this field, emotional labor is not just a professional expectation—it’s often a prescribed lifetime role inherited from family, community, and society.
We are expected to care, but rarely given time to process the cost of caring.
We fight for the most vulnerable, but rarely have protections for ourselves.
We hold space for grief, trauma, and injustice, yet are given no space of our own.
This work is often labeled as a calling—but calling does not mean self-sacrifice. And yet, for so many social workers, that is exactly what it becomes.
The Grief We Carry
Grief in social work is different from personal loss. It is cumulative, layered, and relentless. It lingers in the background of our work, rarely given the attention it deserves.
The grief of systemic failure – knowing that no matter how hard we work, the system remains stacked against the people we serve.
The grief of client loss – when someone we fought for is lost to violence, addiction, homelessness, or suicide.
The grief of burnout – when exhaustion steals our passion and the work that once brought purpose now only brings depletion.
The grief of invisibility – when our labor is overlooked, our caseloads increase, and we are expected to keep going without acknowledgment or support.
Unlike other professions, there are no formal grief spaces for social workers. We are expected to compartmentalize, move on, and show up for the next crisis. But the weight does not simply disappear—it just accumulates, waiting for a breaking point.
Burnout Is Not a Personal Failure
Burnout in social work is often framed as an individual issue, something we should "manage" with mindfulness, self-care, or better boundaries. But burnout is not a personal failure—it is a workplace failure, a structural failure, and an industry-wide issue.
Social workers burn out because:
Caseloads are unmanageable, often exceeding ethical and effective limits. Current productivity measures even encourage high caseloads, double-booking, or overbooking to account for client/patient no-shows and cancellations. Regardless of the circumstances of clients, social workers are still held accountable to deliver and perform to meet metrics that do not account for human experiences.
The emotional weight of the work is treated as an invisible expectation, rather than something that requires care and processing.
The field lacks built-in mechanisms for decompression, forcing workers to absorb trauma with nowhere to release it.
Salary compensation and wages are not reflective of the emotional and intellectual labor required to sustain this work.
Telling social workers to "practice self-care" without addressing these systemic issues is like handing someone a bucket for a sinking ship.
Who Supports the Supporters?
If social workers are expected to carry the emotional burdens of society, then society must also carry the responsibility of supporting them. This means more than just "thank you for your service" posts during Social Work Month. It means:
Workplace reform – fair caseload limits, built-in debriefing, and emotional support resources.
Better pay and benefits – compensation that reflects the intensity and necessity of the work.
Policy advocacy – laws that protect social workers from unfair workloads, low wages, and unsafe conditions.
Organizational accountability – ensuring that BIPOC and women social workers are not shouldering the hardest cases without equitable recognition or promotion.
We cannot sustain this work if the people doing it are treated as disposable.
Reclaiming Our Space: Self-Care as Resistance
While systemic change is necessary, social workers also need immediate ways to reclaim space for themselves. Self-care in this field is not about bubble baths or weekend retreats—it is about setting boundaries that protect your ability to keep doing the work you love.
Actionable Self-Care Strategies:
Create a grief practice – Acknowledge the losses that come with the job. Journal, create rituals, or find colleagues who understand and can hold space for you.
Say NO to unrealistic expectations – Your job is to support, not to sacrifice yourself. Enforce workload boundaries.
Find your decompression space – Whether it is therapy, supervision, or community with other social workers, find a place to process what you carry.
Reclaim your time – You do not have to be accessible 24/7. Protect your evenings, your weekends, your peace.
Know your worth – If your workplace refuses to respect your labor, seek out settings where your work is valued. You are not trapped.
Advocate for change – Join social work organizations, unions, or advocacy groups that are fighting for structural change in the profession.
Call to Action: Beyond Awareness, Toward Change
Acknowledging the grief of social work is just the beginning. Real change requires action. If you are a social worker, an ally, or someone who values this profession, here’s how you can help:
For Social Workers:
Join the movement – Get involved in professional organizations like NASW (National Association of Social Workers) to advocate for better working conditions.
Speak up – If your workplace is unsupportive, push for changes that protect your well-being. Document issues, organize with colleagues, and hold leadership accountable.
Prioritize your needs – Give yourself permission to rest, set boundaries, and leave toxic workplaces if necessary.
For Employers & Institutions:
Fund mental health support for social workers – Provide access to debriefing, therapy, and burnout prevention programs.
Reduce caseloads – Ensure that social workers are not stretched beyond ethical and effective limits.
Compensate fairly – Advocate for increased funding and pay equity to reflect the demands of the profession.
For the Public:
Support legislation that protects social workers – Advocate for policies that ensure fair pay, mental health support, and safe working conditions.
Donate to social work initiatives – Many organizations supporting social workers rely on community funding to provide resources and advocacy.
Acknowledge the emotional labor – Express appreciation for social workers not just with words, but by supporting policies that improve their working conditions.
We Deserve More
Women social workers have been the backbone of change, healing, and justice for generations. But we are not martyrs—we are professionals, advocates, and people who deserve care and respect in return.
This Social Work Month and Women's History Month, let’s not just reflect on the work we do—let’s also reflect on our worth. Let’s name the grief, the exhaustion, and the emotional labor that has long been overlooked. And let us demand more than just recognition—we deserve real support. The work we do matters. And so do we.
Let’s connect. Email me: moniqueevanstherapy@gmail.com
Accepting individual, couples, and family clients (self-pay and select insurance via headway.co- Monique Evans, LCSW)
For social work clinicians, I also offer clinical consultation meetings (Not to be confused with clinical supervision for licensure hours) at any level of practice.
Book me as your mental health presenter for speaking engagements, podcasts, panels, and presentations.
Disclaimer:
The intention for using social media for social workers and other mental health professionals is for marketing, education, advocacy, thought leadership, and providing content in a technologically changing field. We want to do this while making potential therapy-seekers aware of the risks and benefits of engagement on social media and Internet where mental health professionals are present. A therapeutic relationship is a professional relationship and in today's technological climate, a social media presence or following your therapist on social media is not to be confused with a relationship outside of therapy. Ethical, professional, and therapeutic boundaries must be followed and honored.
A counseling social media page or blog is not psychotherapy, a replacement for a therapeutic relationship, or substitute for mental health and medical care. A social media presence as a counseling professional is not seeking an endorsement, request, or rating from past or current clients. No social media posts or blog should be considered professional advice. The information contained in posts is general information for educational purposes only.
Be mindful of sharing personal details or details or others if you choose to comment.
Please consult your physician or mental health provider regarding advice or support for your health and wellbeing.
If you or someone you know is experiencing a medical and/or psychiatric mental health crisis and requires assistance, please call 911 emergency services.
988- National Suicide Prevention Hotline (24 hours a day, 7 days a week)
Safe Horizon 24-hour Hotlines (se habla español):
Domestic violence victims: 800-621-HOPE (4673)